To mom on her 73rd birthday

Nancy Cousins with J.P.

My dearest mom,

There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think about you several times. It’s been almost five years since you left us, and I still miss your almost daily phone calls and chance to get together for a meal or just to chat.

The world has changed so much in five years. I really think you would love the new Keurigs that allow you to make iced tea instantly — and you can record all your favorite shows now without even using a videotape.

Paige's Cancerversary
Paige drinks tea at her cancerversary celebration at Dicken’s Tea Room in Lake Mary.

But more importantly, of course, is family. Paige has gone five years with no recurrence of breast cancer and J.P. just keeps growing. He’ll be a teenager this year. That’s so hard to believe, but I’m sure you’re making sure the angels keep a close eye on him — and us — every day.

We’re almost becoming victims of our own success. He’s too big now for Paige to pick up by herself, and that limits her ability to go places with him by herself.

We got approval for in-home nursing in December to help Paige while I’m at work, and we’re in the process of getting a lift installed to help get him around the house. It’s something I always figured would happen eventually, but it’s hard to believe the time has come.

J.P. at Christmas
J.P. opens his stocking on Christmas morning.

The holidays this year went by way too fast. For the first time that I can remember, we didn’t even have time to get our Christmas tree put up. We resorted to a small tabletop one for Walmart just so J.P. wouldn’t feel like we totally abandoned the celebration.

J.P. was admitted twice to the hospital for what I still believe is a shunt malfunction, but it has been difficult to get the neurosurgeon to tap his shunt without more obvious symptoms. The first time he was admitted, blood work showed his sodium level was out of whack, and the second was blamed on too few dirty diapers.

Things still aren’t right with J.P., and we’ve been to the doctor several times and had more blood work to try to figure out what’s going on. I’m praying for some answers, and hope they come soon.

While he doesn’t seem to be in obvious pain, he’s not himself, and seems to be having fewer wet diapers and retaining more fluid in his body. Please keep telling those angels to bless our child.

Paige is also recovering from wrist surgery on the day after Christmas. It seemed like a good time to get it done as she was waking up in pain almost every night because of carpal tunnel syndrome. She’s slowly getting better, and I thank God for that.

The crazy times during the holidays and the beginning of the new year are the examples of the times I miss you most. You were a great listener, a confidant and a prayer warrior.

While you couldn’t change difficult circumstances, you were always there with the love that only a caring mother can provide.

The world dimmed a bit when you left this Earth, but I’m sure heaven became a bit brighter at the same time.

I thank you now for the love you provided to me and my family because I don’t think I thanked you or appreciated it nearly enough when you were around.

With love,


2 Comments on “To mom on her 73rd birthday

  1. Beautiful 🙂
    Im sorry for your loss. I lost my sister 9 months ago and it really does help me to keep her up to date.

  2. Beautiful, beautiful post, Jeff. I remember your mother fondly and she was definitely a warrior for your family. I’m sorry things have been so unsettled for you all lately. And it is so extraordinary to take a step back and to think of all you and Paige have achieved with JP and life itself over the past several years. I continue to keep all three of you in my prayers and I’m so relieved Paige has continued to remain cancer-free. Amen! Plus, I’m so proud of all the running you’ve been doing and the steps you’ve made to ensure you’re here for the long term, as well. And man, you have some WHEELS! Can’t believe what a fast runner you’ve become!!

    I know somewhere you’re mom is watching you daily and continuing to be your prayer and love warrior.

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Cynthia Weirr

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Cynthia Weirr

Create A Better Version Of Yourself


Because we’re all recovering from something.

Trading Barbs With Barb

Irreverent Musings With A Message

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